Body Positivity, Body Liberation, and Sewing
Cracking the code on my half-elasticated skirt seems to have cracked open something in my feelings about my body in relation to sewing. I felt so happy to figure out how to make a skirt that I feel comfortable in, mind, body, and heart-wise.
I've been having trouble knowing how to be with my body, since it changed rapidly from September to December of last year. As a sewist, this is particularly troublesome because we must know our bodies to sew for our bodies. Suddenly, I didn't know my bra size, I didn't know for sure my bust/waist/hips any more. I had to learn how to do an FBA for the first time. I sized out of some pattern companies' designs in the hips. I felt dysphoric in one place that has been a source of confidence in the past and have really struggled with these feelings.
In the process of documenting my sewing in 2018, I've struggled with how to talk about my body. I felt ashamed to start blogging again when my last round of steady blogging in 2016, I was about 30 pounds less. I felt like I had to joke or apologize or explain or hide the fact that my body has changed... but I also felt guilty for it being a big deal to me because I often read from other women how hard it is when people who are smaller talk about their own issues with their bodies... and there are myriad other ways that bodies and corporeality create and sustain oppression that I will never have to face. The last thing I ever want to do is make anyone else feel bad about their own bodies in writing about my own body, nor do I want to gloss over the intersectionality of corporeal experience and privilege.
When I posted a picture on Instagram of my new skirt, I put the hashtag bodypositivity on it. That skirt made me feel so much better on so many levels - because I made something that worked for my body and I felt successful, flattered, and comfortable again in a me-made skirt... a garment that was giving me a lot of trouble lately that used to be a TNT for me. Posting that hashtag felt really good - but it also made me think of ways that I have struggled and times that I have not been positive or kind to my body.
I just had a change of heart about talking about my body and sewing in that moment. Since then, I've read a ton of posts on the Curvy Sewing Collective and other blogs. One quote from a post on the Curvy Sewing Collective by Mary Rockcastle of Sablecraft stood out to me so much.
It is a necessity that I find a lot of people overlook in the sewing community: it is essential in order to participate in the online union of seamstresses we must share our bodies online, sometimes in intimate ways. In order for others to truly appreciate our work and accomplishments they must study the way our clothes fit our bodies and thus our bodies themselves. I can think of no other semblance of women that invite strangers on the internet to look closely at the fit of our clothes, but we seamstresses are daring and brave.
It truly can feel really vulnerable and challenging to share your body with other sewists online. There's no hiding. When writing about fitting - I often feel a nervous compulsion to try to try to excuse or apologize for my size, joke about my body shape, or compare myself to a fruit - but here's the real T.
I am almost 5'2". I currently measure 39 bust, 33 waist, 51 low hips. That's an 18" difference between waist and hips, which is my greatest fitting challenge... I am always looking for styles that accommodate this size difference (Size 14 in the waist and 24 in my current favorite pattern company's size chart). My other major fitting challenge that I deal with on nearly all tops and dresses now, is that I have narrow shoulders compared to my bust. 15" from shoulder to shoulder, across the back, so a lot of necklines are too broad and slip off my shoulders.
I am not a pear, a spoon, a bell, or an upward triangle.
I am a person.
These are the measurements of the canvas with which I work to make garments.
No one else has the exact same measurements I do - I am unique, as we all are.
Sometimes I feel comfortable in my own skin and sometimes I feel uncomfortable.
Sometimes I feel beautiful and sometimes I don't.
Sometimes I love my body, sometimes I don't.
All of this is valid and human.
How we talk about our bodies has a lot to do with our relationship to body positivity and peace.
A blog that one of my friends recently reposted on Instagram really spoke to me as my mind is shifting around being more open and patient with myself - it talks about body liberation vs. body love.
Jes from The Militant Baker writes:
What I have come to realize, though, is that asking someone to achieve body love can quickly become another unattainable prerequisite, much like the desire to change our body into what is deemed desirable.
This resonated so much because I feel like it's stressful to process all the emotions around your body and the expectation that you are always loving your body may put too much focus on the body as an aesthetic battlefield instead of getting past anxiety and negativity surrounding body issues.
She also writes:
"Liberation is freedom from all outside expectations, even our own. Liberation is not having to love your body all the time. Liberation is not asking permission to be included in society’s ideal of beauty. Liberation is bucking the concept of beauty as currency altogether. Liberation is recognizing the systemic issues that surround us and acknowledging that perhaps we’re not able to fix them all on our own. Liberation is personally giving ourselves permission to live life."
The word "Liberation" speaks to me so strongly and it has really shifted something in me to be able to write and think and sew more honestly, more freely, with less expectation, fear, or shame.
I've been having trouble knowing how to be with my body, since it changed rapidly from September to December of last year. As a sewist, this is particularly troublesome because we must know our bodies to sew for our bodies. Suddenly, I didn't know my bra size, I didn't know for sure my bust/waist/hips any more. I had to learn how to do an FBA for the first time. I sized out of some pattern companies' designs in the hips. I felt dysphoric in one place that has been a source of confidence in the past and have really struggled with these feelings.
In the process of documenting my sewing in 2018, I've struggled with how to talk about my body. I felt ashamed to start blogging again when my last round of steady blogging in 2016, I was about 30 pounds less. I felt like I had to joke or apologize or explain or hide the fact that my body has changed... but I also felt guilty for it being a big deal to me because I often read from other women how hard it is when people who are smaller talk about their own issues with their bodies... and there are myriad other ways that bodies and corporeality create and sustain oppression that I will never have to face. The last thing I ever want to do is make anyone else feel bad about their own bodies in writing about my own body, nor do I want to gloss over the intersectionality of corporeal experience and privilege.
When I posted a picture on Instagram of my new skirt, I put the hashtag bodypositivity on it. That skirt made me feel so much better on so many levels - because I made something that worked for my body and I felt successful, flattered, and comfortable again in a me-made skirt... a garment that was giving me a lot of trouble lately that used to be a TNT for me. Posting that hashtag felt really good - but it also made me think of ways that I have struggled and times that I have not been positive or kind to my body.
I just had a change of heart about talking about my body and sewing in that moment. Since then, I've read a ton of posts on the Curvy Sewing Collective and other blogs. One quote from a post on the Curvy Sewing Collective by Mary Rockcastle of Sablecraft stood out to me so much.
It is a necessity that I find a lot of people overlook in the sewing community: it is essential in order to participate in the online union of seamstresses we must share our bodies online, sometimes in intimate ways. In order for others to truly appreciate our work and accomplishments they must study the way our clothes fit our bodies and thus our bodies themselves. I can think of no other semblance of women that invite strangers on the internet to look closely at the fit of our clothes, but we seamstresses are daring and brave.
It truly can feel really vulnerable and challenging to share your body with other sewists online. There's no hiding. When writing about fitting - I often feel a nervous compulsion to try to try to excuse or apologize for my size, joke about my body shape, or compare myself to a fruit - but here's the real T.
I am almost 5'2". I currently measure 39 bust, 33 waist, 51 low hips. That's an 18" difference between waist and hips, which is my greatest fitting challenge... I am always looking for styles that accommodate this size difference (Size 14 in the waist and 24 in my current favorite pattern company's size chart). My other major fitting challenge that I deal with on nearly all tops and dresses now, is that I have narrow shoulders compared to my bust. 15" from shoulder to shoulder, across the back, so a lot of necklines are too broad and slip off my shoulders.
I am not a pear, a spoon, a bell, or an upward triangle.
I am a person.
These are the measurements of the canvas with which I work to make garments.
No one else has the exact same measurements I do - I am unique, as we all are.
Sometimes I feel comfortable in my own skin and sometimes I feel uncomfortable.
Sometimes I feel beautiful and sometimes I don't.
Sometimes I love my body, sometimes I don't.
All of this is valid and human.
 |
| I didn't post this before because I felt self-conscious when I saw the photo of this me-made Sorbetto... even though I was happy in the moment it was taken. This is me. Flattering or unflattering - I like this picture because I know I was happy in that moment. |
How we talk about our bodies has a lot to do with our relationship to body positivity and peace.
A blog that one of my friends recently reposted on Instagram really spoke to me as my mind is shifting around being more open and patient with myself - it talks about body liberation vs. body love.
Jes from The Militant Baker writes:
What I have come to realize, though, is that asking someone to achieve body love can quickly become another unattainable prerequisite, much like the desire to change our body into what is deemed desirable.
This resonated so much because I feel like it's stressful to process all the emotions around your body and the expectation that you are always loving your body may put too much focus on the body as an aesthetic battlefield instead of getting past anxiety and negativity surrounding body issues.
She also writes:
"Liberation is freedom from all outside expectations, even our own. Liberation is not having to love your body all the time. Liberation is not asking permission to be included in society’s ideal of beauty. Liberation is bucking the concept of beauty as currency altogether. Liberation is recognizing the systemic issues that surround us and acknowledging that perhaps we’re not able to fix them all on our own. Liberation is personally giving ourselves permission to live life."
The word "Liberation" speaks to me so strongly and it has really shifted something in me to be able to write and think and sew more honestly, more freely, with less expectation, fear, or shame.
Beautiful post, beautiful friend, beautiful woman!
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